My mother was one of eight kids. When she was born, there was no name on her birth certificate, just “girl” Abend. It seems things were so different these days. I can’t even imagine a baby being born without a name on the birth certificate. Nowadays, married adults not only find out the sex of a child before it is born, they hold reveal parties and plan accordingly.

Even if I was giving birth now, I would not like to find out the sex of the baby before it is born. I had the chance to, with both of my kids, but I chose not to. I liked the element of surprise. When I had my first son, I desperately wanted a girl the second time. By accident, the doctor revealed the sex to my husband. When my husband told me I was having another boy, I was disappointed for a split second, but this feeling did not last long, and now I can’t imagine my family any other way.

My husband had two sisters, though he fiercely wanted a brother. I have a brother who is much older (eleven years), as well as a sister, who is five years older. By the time I was six, my brother was in college so I did not see him much. Now that we are in the same stage of life, my brother and I are very close. Because I had grown up with my sister, I assumed I would have a daughter. It never dawned on me that I wouldn’t. I knew what girls liked, but boys? I was in the dark about what their needs were.

Fortunately, because I had my first son, I was a quick learner and loved every minute of raising the second boy. My husband was secretly thrilled that my older son would have a brother. I, too, was happy, and hoped they would grow up to be close. So, while I may have accidentally found out I was having a second son, I quickly understood what a blessing it was. Finding out would not have made any difference in how I raised him. Every child is different, and I loved raising my boys (err…men). Once they put that child in your arms, it is pure love, no matter what the sex.

Though my boys may be very different, they both love desserts with apples. So, when the Fall comes, I really enjoy going apple picking and finding apple desserts to serve them. This one is really special because it is so very close to actually having a caramel apple, (OMG –  my mouth is watering just thinking about it). This cake screams fall in every bite. The apples are dressed with savory goodies, like cardamom, cloves, and cinnamon. It is topped with oats, (my favorite!) and brown sugar, and is just the right amount of sweet. The pecans add a nice crunchy texture. It is then topped with more caramel sauce, which is heavenly, because let’s face it, you just can’t have too much caramel on anything.

This recipe is courtesy of New York Times Cooking and makes 8 to 10 servings of the most sweet and delicious fall dessert you will ever taste.

Ingredients for Skillet Caramel Apple Crisp:

FOR THE CARAMEL SAUCE:

2 cups granulated sugar
¾ cup unsalted butter (1 1/2 sticks), diced
1 cup heavy cream
1 teaspoon vanilla bean paste or extract
1 teaspoon kosher salt

FOR THE FILLING:

3 pounds tart, firm apples such as Mutsu, Jonathan or Honeycrisp, (about 6 medium apples)
1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
½ teaspoon ground cardamom
⅛ teaspoon ground cloves
Pinch of kosher salt

FOR THE TOPPING:

1 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup old-fashioned oats
⅓ cup chopped pecans (optional)
⅓ cup light brown sugar
½ teaspoon kosher salt
½ cup/115 grams unsalted butter (1 stick), softened

Make the caramel sauce:

Add the granulated sugar and 1/4 cup water to a 3-quart saucepan and stir to combine.

Add the butter and set it over medium-high heat, but do not stir.

Cook, without stirring, until the butter and sugar have completely melted and started to bubble, 4 to 5 minutes.

After the mixture has begun to brown at the edges, use a heatproof spatula to carefully stir it occasionally until it is deep golden brown and beginning to smoke just slightly, about 4 to 5 minutes.

Do not walk away from the pan during this process as the caramel will go from perfectly golden to burned in moments.

When the mixture is deep golden, remove the pan from the heat, and carefully whisk in the heavy cream.

The mixture will expand and sputter before turning into a smooth sauce.

Add the vanilla and salt.

If the caramel is at all lumpy, return the pan to the stove on low heat and whisk until smooth.

You should have about 2 cups.

Carefully pour the caramel into a heat-safe container to cool.

Prepare the filling:

Heat your oven to 350 degrees and set a rack in the center.

Peel, core and slice the apples into 1/2-inch slices, removing any bruised bits if necessary.

Combine the sliced apples, lemon juice, spices and salt in a large bowl, and stir to combine.

Drizzle 1/2 cup caramel sauce over the top and stir again.

Scrape the apples and all of their juices into a 9- or 10-inch oven-safe skillet.

Make the topping:

In the same bowl, combine the flour, oats, pecans, sugar and salt.

Stir until well combined, then add the butter and mash it into the dry ingredients with your fingers until crumbs form.

Pour the crumb topping evenly over the apples.

Bake the crisp until the topping is golden and the juices are bubbling, 40 to 50 minutes.

Serve warm with more warm caramel sauce and ice cream.

Store any remaining sauce in an airtight container in the refrigerator for about a week.

It can be rewarmed for later use in a saucepan over low heat.

It’s that simple!

During this crazy health crisis, it is important that we all take care of each other.  Giving without the expectation of anything in return will elevate your happiness and sense of caring. It shows that you are thinking of someone, and will help you strengthen the bond that you have with them.

There is a social value to gift-giving as well. For thousands of years, people have engaged in “potlatch”, now an antiquated term, that was a happy ceremony that celebrates engaging in this custom. Many moons ago, the status of a family was dictated not by their wealth, but instead by those who gave away the most. The more lavish the potlatch, the more prestigious the family was.

Whether it is a gift of time, a meal, or a necklace, gift giving is one of the ways one can show a partner that they care. It can strengthen a bond or even signal that a relationship is likely to end. With many branches of social science weighing in, the New York Times wrote that giving gifts is “a surprisingly complex and important part of human interaction and will help define relationships and strengthen bonds with family and friends.” They also note that it is often the giver, rather than the recipient who reaps the most psychological gains from a gift.

This is a cue for all of us to go out of our way and make someone happy. By doing this, the biggest effect may be on ourselves. It reinforces our feelings for them, but also makes us feel effective and caring, and who could want anything more?

If you make this delicious treat, you may want to make another batch and give it to someone you care about. These perfect pecan bars will surely make their day. The heavy cream adds a depth of flavor that ensures these bars are delightfully rich. The honey makes it lip smacking, gooey, and sweet. The orange and lemon zest gives it savory tang, and of course the pecans add a smokey, nutty goodness. They are housed by an elegant crust, making each bite irresistible. These bars are a delightful treat, for dessert, breakfast, or a snack. It is love in every bite.

This recipe is courtesy of Ina Garten, who never, ever disappoints. It will serve 6 to 8 of the luckiest people.

Ingredients for Ina Garten’s Pecan Squares:

For the Crust:

2 1/2 cups Unsalted Butter, room temperature (this is 5 sticks of butter or 1.25 lbs)
3/4 cup Granulated Sugar
3 Eggs, large
3/4 teaspoon Pure Vanilla Extract
4 1/2 cups All-Purpose Flour
1/2 teaspoon Baking Powder
1/4 teaspoon Salt

For the Filling:

2 cups Unsalted Butter (this is 4 sticks of butter or 1 lb)
1 cup Honey
3 cups Light Brown Sugar, packed
1 teaspoon Grated Lemon Zest
1 teaspoon Grated Orange Zest
1/4 cup Heavy Cream
2 pounds Chopped Pecans

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.

Make the Crust:

Beat the butter and granulated sugar in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with a paddle attachment, until light, approximately 3 minutes.

Add the eggs and the vanilla and mix well.

In a separate bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder, and salt.

Mix the dry ingredients into the batter with the mixer on low speed until just combined.

Press the dough evenly into an ungreased 18 by 12 by 1-inch baking sheet, making an edge around the outside.

(Note: The crust dough will be very sticky. To make it easier to work with, dust your hands and the dough with some flour as you work.)

Bake for 15 minutes, until the crust is set but not browned. Allow to cool.

Make the filling:

Combine the butter, honey, brown sugar, and zests in a large, heavy-bottomed saucepan.

Cook over low heat until the butter is melted, using a wooden spoon to stir.

Raise the heat and boil for 3 minutes.

Remove from the heat.

Stir in the heavy cream and pecans.

Pour the filling over the crust, trying not to get the filling between the crust and the pan.

Bake for 25 to 30 minutes, until the filling is set.

Remove from the oven and allow to cool.

Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate until cold.

Cut into bars and serve.

It’s that simple!